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🌻 What I Learned Traveling the World Alone Without My Partner
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without a travel partner, I forced myself to shake off my inhibitions, allowing myself to be vulnerable “Can I just sit anywhere?” I asked the waiter. He stared at me for a beat. “Can I just sit anywhere?” I repeated, suddenly wondering if I had violated an obscure Colombian cultural norm by asking. Maybe, in Colombia, you were supposed to just boldly sit down anywhere, even if you didn’t have a reservation. Maybe this was another negative aftereffect of Spanish colonialism that I didn’t yet understand. Finally, the waiter shook off his reverie and listlessly gestured to a table, still apparently confused. Sinking into my seat, I basked in the knowledge that I had successfully acquired a place in this restaurant. It wasn’t until hours later that I learned there was a difference between sentarse (to sit) and sentirse (technically, to feel one’s self). I hadn’t, in fact, been asking if I could sit anywhere. Instead, I had been asking, repeatedly and with confidence, “Can I just touch myself anywhere?” I blamed my boyfriend Renzo. He was supposed to protect me from these situations; he was the native Spanish speaker of the two of us. However, he had been busy with a work meeting that day during the hour of my solo excursion. But little did I know that this was merely the first of many similar situations. For the past year, we had both been working remotely, so Renzo could play translator whenever I forgot a word or didn’t have enough functioning brain cells. But many months after my restaurant faux pas, Renzo’s job stopped being remote, temporarily separating us and leading me to embark on several solo travel journeys that turned me into a Merry Loner. Here’s what happened—and what I learned.
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This week, I’m sharing a guest post from talented travel writer, Evan E. Lambert.
Evan is an essayist, journalist, travel writer, and short fiction author with clips at Thought Catalog, People, Business Insider, Mic, Going, Santa Fe Writers Project, Paste, Motley Bloom, and more. He spends much of his time in Lima, Peru, and is fluent in Spanglish.
To going wherever the wind takes you. Until next time, Merry Psst! Do you have a friend who's maybe a little too clingy in their relationship? Encourage them (with love, patience, and compassion) to push themselves out of their comfort zone and find more confidence spending time with themselves. Just forward them this email. Did someone forward you this email? Luck you! You've got someone who cares about you. For more stories and encouragement on learning to value yourself, sign up for A Merry Loner's newsletter. |
A Merry Loner
Because when you can be happy on your own, you can do anything. Subscribe for essays, guides, and recommendations on "Loner Living," AKA books, solo travel, analog living, and ethical consumption.
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